"Death Is Not Dying": Guest Post by Kelsey

 Note to readers: This article was originally written in June, 2009, but its subject is timeless, therefore we share it here, in hopes that it may continue to reach into and touch hearts.)

 Several weeks ago, I came across a video on the internet by a woman named Rachel Barkey, and it impacted me immensely.

Rachel has terminal cancer that has spread throughout her body.  She has a husband, 2 small children and approximately 6 weeks to live.

Pretty bleak-sounding, isn’t it? 

But the talk Rachel gave on her video was called “Death is not Dying,” (click on the link to listen to her message and to find out more about Rachel's life and faith). In it she gave a beautiful, faith-filled message about a God who would let a 38-year-old wife and mother die of cancer.

Because Rachel understands God is bigger than she can understand, she is accepting God’s grace and facing death without bitterness.

Watching Rachel speak, I wondered, “Wow, would I be able to handle death like that?”

Being only 19, I don’t think about death too much.  Most of us don’t. 

But should we?

I have come to believe that we should.

The perspective of death gives such a clear vision for life.

           

I think about what Rachel’s last weeks of life must be like.  I don’t know her personally, but I can’t see a dying woman spending a whole lot of time on You Tube or Tangle or even Facebook.  I’m pretty sure she isn’t going to be watching movies, reading books or listening to music unless it will unquestionably draw her closer to Jesus Christ.

I think Rachel’s relationships are also going to change.

She will probably be saying things like “I love you,” “I’m sorry,” “I’m proud of you,” and “thank you” with greater frequency than before.  She will probably hug harder and more often.  She will probably make every conversation as meaningful as she can.

Rachel is definitely spending more time reading God’s Word and praying.

Hearing this, many of you may be thinking, “How morbid!  Why should we analyze the final weeks of a dying woman?  We aren’t the ones dying!”

Aren’t we?

In James it says our life is like a vapor.  In other words, very brief.  

And none of us are guaranteed 80 years of life, or next year, or even our next breath.  I could die before Rachel.  I have no guarantees.  Daniel 5:23 says God holds my breath in His hands.

Does that scare me?  No, it gives me confidence.  My earthly life and its length are not just happenstance, coincidence or fate.  They are granted by my gracious, loving, merciful Heavenly Father.

If each of us lived as if this were our dying day, how would our lives change?  Are you thinking about your life as you live it?  Or is it just going by?  Do you live each week, day and hour as if it could be your last one on this earth?

This is where the concept of thinking about death really makes sense.

When we think about dying, it makes us see life as a gift, something to truly cherish and live in a way pleasing to God, redeeming the time.

Ephesians 5:15-16--“See then that ye walk circumspectly, not as fools, but as wise, redeeming the time, because the days are evil.”

There is one other thing I know Rachel is doing with her last weeks on earth.  Rachel is telling people about Jesus and what He has done for her and for them.  Because in approximately 6 weeks, Rachel is going to a place where everyone will know the Lord and worship Him for all of eternity. 

What are we doing to reach out to the lost people around us?  We might not have tomorrow, or they might not.

1 Thessalonians 5 says:

“But ye, brethren, are not in darkness, that that day should overtake you as a thief.  Ye are all the children of light and the children of the day.  We are not of the night, nor of the darkness.  Therefore, let us not sleep, as do others; but let us watch and be sober.”

So, I have re-examined my list of things I expected Rachel, as a dying woman, to do, and I’ve made it into a list for myself:  A joyful to-do list for every last week of my life.

-Limit books, movies and music to the impact-ful.

-Treat time as precious, not something to mindlessly waste.

-Hug people.

-Have more conversations, less gossip and banter.

-Say “I’m sorry” and “I love you,” and show gratitude.

-Tell people about Jesus and what He has done for them.

-Don’t be ashamed of the Gospel.

-Love God’s Word, and expect to hear from Him every time you open it.

-Be in constant fellowship with God through prayer.

-Live life one day at a time, and rejoice in it.

[Note to readers: This article was originally written in June, 2009.  On July 2, 2009, Rachel Barkey rejoiced to see her Savior, Jesus Christ, face-to-face.  She now lives with Him forevermore.  We continue to pray for her family.  If you do not know where you will be when you die, or aren't sure, and have questions, please feel free to contact Kelsey or I (Wendy) and we'd love to talk to you about that!  (See contact info above.)

If you came looking for the "Love and Marriage Series" you can click on the link to read past posts.  For a time, we are presenting a series of Guest Posts by Kelsey, my 21-year-old daughter.  I hope you like them!
Click on the links to read other posts by Kelsey: Making Wise Choices, Part 1 and Making Wise Choices, Part 2]

About Me

Hello, readers of my mother's blog!  :)  My name is Kelsey--it's nice to meet all of you!

I'm 21 years old and live at home with my wacky and lovely family, where I do most of the cooking/baking/grocery shopping as well as other tasks to help my family.  I also nanny once a week for a family of 3 little boys who I adore, and work sporadically part-time for a family friend who owns a business cleaning new construction (think cement dust and sawdust).  And there are many other things that keep me busy day-to-day.  But the thing I want to be known for, the thing that really defines me and that I want to impact others with, is that God gave His Son to redeem my life from destruction, and make me His child.  That is my identity, and I am nothing without Him.  I truly desire my whole life to reflect my gratitude and love for Him, but I often fail, which is why my favorite attribute of God is His unending PATIENCE.
The posts I will be sharing with you, at least initially, are from a young ladies' Bible study I hosted last year, therefore they were meant for young unmarried girls, but my mom felt they were still applicable to all her readers, no matter their stage in life.  I certainly don't claim to have any special insights, or to be perfected in these things--these are simply the challenges and thoughts God placed on my heart as I studied my Bible, read some good books, and learned about the lives of "heroes of the faith" last summer.  I hope the posts are helpful to you as you also seek to know Him and be like Him.