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Faith's Firm Foundation: Link to "What Hill Are You Dying On?"

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Link to "What Hill Are You Dying On?"

Joanne at Blessed (One So Blessed) has written an excellent post for Exemplify Online that, if you are a woman (wife or daughter), you need to read.  I related to it all too well.  It is entitled: "What Hill Are You Dying On?"  In answer to that question, some of us would have to say, "Why, every hill! There are none too small!"  I find myself challenging and correcting my husband, and also my children, all too often, setting up a confrontational home environment.  The Lord has convicted me that it is pride.

 Only by pride cometh contention:
but with the well advised is wisdom.  
Proverbs 13:10 (KJV)

When pride cometh, then cometh shame:
but with the lowly is wisdom.
Proverbs 11:2 (KJV)

I was raised by a dad who demanded absolute respect and obedience.  Unfortunately, he had a rebellious daughter.  He said everything dogmatically. So did I.  He was prone to say, "Look at me when I'm talking to you!"  And I would be looking somewhere else thinking about what I was going to say next! Ready always to defend myself, or correct that little thing he said wrong! (In later years, he mellowed, I got saved, and we became very close!) But, in my growing-up years, if you wanted to be heard in our home, you had to speak up loudly and firmly!  So, I learned to say things as though they were the gospel truth, even when I was really unsure, or didn't even realize I was doing it!  This habit got me into a lot of trouble in my early years of marriage.  My husband pointed this trait out to me on more than one occasion.  I am still learning not to die on every hill, and to choose my battles (another phrase that my husband likes to use).  I *think* that I have learned this lesson: that prayer is more effective than my words, and that I don't need to say everything that comes into my mind!  These are some statements that I have thought to say to my children, and haven't.  "You can't go out looking like that!" "What were you thinking!"  "Surely you knew that _____"  "When did you start eating that? You don't like that (food)!"  "You're becoming ___, and you'd better change fast, or you're going to _____." But I have actually said much worse!

Now, in my own family and marriage, I see that "speaking our minds" is a characteristic which is "caught".  Do you women and girls who are reading this know how much influence you have on the atmosphere in your home?  I have been startled, shocked, amazed and humbled when I have made an effort to change my tone, at various and sundry times, prompted by the Holy Spirit, to be more _____ (fill in the blank: cheerful, gentle, encouraging, non-complaining/grateful, praising of others), and I have felt the spirit of our home completely transformed!

Lord, make me submissive
Give me a meek and quiet spirit
which is beautiful in Your sight.
Amen.

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2 Comments:

Blogger Katherine Sophia said...

That is a good reminder that not every hill is worth dieing on...
oh, and you've been awarded! :)
http://firstseekhim.blogspot.com/2010/03/blog-award.html

March 24, 2010 at 6:25 PM  
Blogger Kelly @ Wisdom Begun said...

Choosing my battles is something I stumble with greatly. I am learning slowly but surely, through the grace of God.

Thank you, Wendy, for your encouraging words, both on your blog and on my blog posts. You are such a sweet woman!

March 25, 2010 at 8:33 AM  

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Hi and welcome to my blog! Come on in and make yourself at home! I love connecting. Comments are the way to do that! Tell me about yourself. Please connect back, ok?
Blessings,
Wendy
If you would rather, my email address is faithsfirmfoundation(at)embarqmail(dot)com

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