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Timely Tips on Tuesday: You've Got A Friend

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Faith's Firm Foundation: Timely Tips on Tuesday: You've Got A Friend

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Timely Tips on Tuesday: You've Got A Friend

He that walketh with wise men shall be wise: but a companion of fools shall be destroyed.
Proverbs 13:20
The list is almost complete of the "Ten Things" that I would tell a younger mom are the most important to focus on in Child-Training:
10) Finally, but definitely not least important, choose wise companions. Choose wise companions. Choose wise companions. Choose wise companions. Proverbs 13:20 says,"He that walketh with wise men shall be wise: but a companion of fools shall be destroyed."
Do we understand how important this is? We must not just let friendships happen! We must choose who we’re going to spend time with, because we and our children will become like them. ("Companions" includes the movies we watch, the music we listen to and what we do with the majority of our time!  Am I, as a mom, an example of choosing wise, Godly music and activities?)
We must choose with which families we will walk together through life, side by side. Ask God to send the wisest, Godliest friends to cross your path. Then choose. Don’t let it happen by default. Pray that God will bring into your life those that He wants you to be companions of, for yours and their sake.  Never forget, also, that we must BE wise companions.

Choosing unwise companions, or just “letting friendships happen,” and as a result, having unwise friendships, is the #1 reason, I believe, that Godly families lose their children, or lose their good name, or parents watch their children make a bad marriage choice, or that the family’s fruit doesn’t last. Change neighborhoods, change churches, cut off relationships, if necessary, risk offending someone...but don’t be a companion of a fool. “A companion of fools is destroyed.”  Did you ever notice that the Bible only speaks of wise and foolish people?  There's nothing in between.  Better to have no friends than foolish ones. Spend as much time doing things as a family, as possible.  Do everything together!  Foster friendship in your own family!  Then, get together with other families.  Getting together as families is preferable to sending your children off to a friend's house. If you want a close family, and your children to love each other, don't be doing things separately!  (If they are off away from the rest of the family, know who your children are spending time with, and what they are doing.)  Have families to your home.  Speak highly of the Godly character you see in other families and their children. (This might prompt a great Bible study, as you find out what God thinks is great character!  You might do a word study, for instance, on the "one another" verses.  Or do a study on friendships in the Bible, and study David and Jonathan.  Or study the character traits which Jesus showed to His disciples, and specifically Peter, James and John.)   Point Godly character out, teaching your children to observe others and to be discerning, (this is not judging) and teaching them to recognize Godly character in others, to appreciate it, and to praise it.  Your children will notice what pleases you, and seek to emulate that.  If you constantly praise how beautiful or handsome someone is, that is what they will seek to become.  If you never fail to talk about the athletic prowess of the high school, college, or pro athletes, being good at sports will become their main goal in life.  Show them that you think Godly character and wisdom are important, because God says "wisdom is the principle thing".  (*Integrity check:  Is this the most important thing to me?  If not, what is?  What do I need to do about it? )  Don't make your children feel that you are comparing them to others, though, making them feel that somehow they always come up short.  Praise their Godly character the most.  (Be looking for it. Have an eagle eye, just waiting to "catch" them showing Godly character!)  It is way too easy to become critical!  Especially if you have "good kids", it is easy to take their good behavior for granted, and only talk to them about the little things they need to correct!  This can lead to major discouragement in your child, and eventually they may feel that they can never please you, and feel that they should just give up.

Most of all, spend time together as a family.  Plan learning opportunities together, serve together, do everything together.  By your words and actions, encourage and expect that your children will be best friends with each other.  More than anyone else, your children’s best friends should be their own brothers and sisters, and the wisest companions anyone could have.

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Blogger Denise said...


May 11, 2010 at 7:04 PM  
Blogger glenda09 said...

So true! This was such a great post! Light can't abide in darkness. Thank you for this post!

Glenda @ Me and Mine in a Small Town

May 11, 2010 at 7:29 PM  
Blogger Linda said...

Thanks for these great reminders. You are right.. our kids need godly companions and role models, and we need to start those in the home. Blessings :)

May 11, 2010 at 9:48 PM  
Anonymous KayEm17 said...

I constantly pray for godly friends for my children and family. I also emphasize to them the importance of appreciating the best friends that God has given them right here in their family. Of course, in the midst of sibling rivalry this goes in one ear and out the other.

However, I have also been thinking about how do I balance the need to be the light in this dark world and share the gospel with the ungodly? If we only befriend and spend time with believers, what about those who don't know Christ? How will we ever meet them or develop enough of a relationship with them to share the love of Jesus with them?

This is one of the questions that I grapple with and am praying about.

May 11, 2010 at 10:39 PM  
Blogger glenda09 said...

The above comment was a good one! My answer would be talk to someonet that you don't know. When I go out anywhere I tell people that I don't know about Christ and salvation. The last one was a cashier she so happened to be saved. We talked for a long while and God had drawn me to talk to her. I was like, but God I'm here with my husband it was the first time we went to the store without our son since before he was born 4 years ago and he wanted to go into this one store but I stayed behind arguing with God. LOL when I was walking out of the store I saw a license plate that is Lord of Lords. LOL I was like OK OK OK God! Well, both of us knew why He sent me at the end. She needed to talk to strangers about Christ as well. She said it was great how I just asked her what she did for Easter then I asked what Easter meant to her. She said that she has had conversations with people saying they are saved but she never investigated like I did. I asked her when she got saved and her answer was she was born in the church. I asked well when did you realize that you were still a sinner and that you needed Christ? I told her those are the best stories that I hear when someone is raised in the chruch and they are good girls or boys with good grades, no cusing, no fornicating, no gossiping. Then they realize that they are filthy sinners and need salvation. She agreed. Anyways I had this book One Thing You Can't Do in Heaven. It's my favorite book and I thought it would help her talk to anyone about salvation since that's one thing you can't do in heaven is reach the lost since everyone will be saved. I went home and went right back and brought it to her. She thanked me and promised she would read it. Also, our church on Sat go on outreaches door to door. A lot of people listen to us and pray and give their life to Christ, some people are religous, some people are Pagan (like I was at one time) and others think we are JWs and just shut the door.

Thank you for your prayers. I'll remember to pray for you as well.
To answer your question. I just changed the background and the picture on the top. I didn't have to touch the widgets of the buttons at all. I just left them in the same place and changed the body. If you have any more questions feel free to send me a line. Thank you soo much for stopping by! Hope to see you again soon!

May 12, 2010 at 8:53 AM  
Blogger Wendy said...

Thank you, everybody, for your comments. Great discussion, KayEm and Glenda.
We do need to be sharing our faith, talking to others about Christ, (handing out tracts is something my daughter and I do all the time, too). The mother and father, with the children, (see and notice that they are "together") can be quite a witness to the world, both in action and words. It's the word "companion" that's always been my guide in this. Why am I with this person/group? It needs to be clear. If they are not a wise person, I need to limit my contact with them, and control the situations where we meet, and be protecting my children. You can't risk "losing" your children while "winning" the world. Making disciples, not making friends, was what Christ commanded. You can be warm, loving, but clearly not taking on the behavior or beliefs of the other person. When with your children, be intentional about praying for them (a neighbor, for instance), but it must be made clear, (if your children are old enough to understand), by your actions, maybe by words, too, if you can express it in love (and not cause your children to feel you are attacking the other person), that this is not a person to be a "companion" of, and that we need to share the gospel with them, and pray for them. The Bible teaches that we are to be particularly careful of those who call themselves Christians, but are practicing ungodly behavior, and not to even eat with them. (1 Corinthians 5:11: "But now I have written unto you not to keep company, if any man that is called a brother be a fornicator, or covetous, or an idolator, or a railer, or a drunkard, or an extortioner; with such an one no not to eat.") Be discerning, be in control of the situations, be in prayer for your family. Be loving. Guard your family, and your home.
More thoughts?

May 12, 2010 at 11:40 AM  

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